Spirituality is often the most prevalent topic on the minds of people and communities in recovery from addiction. With good reason, there is usually incredible frustration and confusion over what spirituality means, which is not surprising. When we all have been conditioned to believe we must search, find, and gain faith in something bigger than ourselves—anything with a traditionally religious character, intellectually smarter, ethically stronger, or with the morality of a saint—is the only way we can end our suffering in addiction—faith in anything other than the social failure that we have become.
The frustration is palpable for all of us suffering from addiction because we are desperate to try almost anything that might save us from our pathetic selves. What’s more confusing is some of those we encounter to teach us the way of recovery continue the conditioning and preach similar theories that we can only be saved by some unread book, a new mystical technique, a different “healthy” drug to end cravings, or anything, something else from the outside that we don’t currently possess—anything other than ourselves.
I am grateful and feel blessed to have received the universal grace of understanding that spirituality is not realized by looking outside oneself to learn some philosophical-ideal way of thinking for answers, looking up to the heavens and praying (pleading) for a godly miracle, or yielding to some man-made deity to somehow pay for the religious power to save myself. I now realize that spirituality is being open to life energy flowing through my body and mind, my “True Self”-awakening, being aware of my mind and body, observing my consciousness, understanding the truth that only comes from within, and knowing that I already possess the Higher Power to save myself. Only by doing a deep, sober dive to understand how my mind works, doing the work: to “Know Thyself,” and not to rely on my cultural conditioning—who I think I am—to rediscover the original innocence of my eternal “True Self” that has never changed despite the mental illusion of learned addictions that cover up the beauty of my connection with everything in Life.
The truth is that my mind is addicted to suffering (thinking). Its constant craving for ego identity is its endless ethereal desire to be physically real—if only it could feel it would be something real. It is desperate for attachment to things for identity, so it perceives reality as the illusion of a world it can control. Life, as it is, is never enough for the mind, and it constantly dreams of having more: if my mind is thinking about something, it can become attached and identify with anything in addiction to escape from its prison of thoughts that can never be real.
Spirituality is doing the meditative work to understand the mind. The only way to understand the mind’s workings is to quieten it into a meditative state. This allows my natural awareness to arise in silent witnessing that stills my mind, which can only happen in the present moment. Silent awareness of the mind means understanding that my “True Self” is not trapped in the illusion of psychological time, constantly talking to itself about analyzing the past and controlling the future—where the mind can never exist in reality.
Spirituality is growing my awareness by remembering that my True Self is the constant subtle rhythm of careful observation. I focus sensitively on all life situations—reality—happening around me and respond without the mind blocking the Life energy of Love flowing through my heart into the world, as required in the present moment.
“Real spirituality is everyday life as it is.”[1] Spirituality is the extraordinary understanding of the ordinary: knowing—through awareness—that I am spiritually connected to everything by Love, and my mind has no control over the universal energy of Life happening now. If my mind is quiet, with no “I-ego” resistance—a silent, open mind—my existence is only awareness of peace, joy, and compassion flowing in a river of Love through Life.
So, for me, reaching spirituality is not some arduous journey of prayers, rituals, and prostrations. Spirituality is simply a matter of waking up now to rediscover my true nature, my original innocence—my True Self—that never changes or becomes addicted to illusions. Spirituality is knowing that my True Self is always Aware!
[1] Foster, Jeff, Life Without a Centre: awakening from the dream of separation, Non-Duality Press, Salisbury, UK, 2006, pg. 68.
VAB 10-17-24
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