The ancient philosopher Socrates said, “Education is the kindling of a flame, not the filling of a vessel.” I’m not here to instruct you; I’m not trying to impose new habits, stepwise procedures, or religious dogmas on you. Instead, I would like to show that we already possess the power to open the door and come out from the mental prison of addiction, in which we are all trapped, our thinking mind. I want to point out how I uncovered the power of awareness, which I call my “Higher Power,” to end my addiction right Now, and it is always Now.
When I surrendered myself to getting sober, I didn’t realize that I was trying to free myself from living in ignorance, addicted to my past, imprisoned by psychological time in my thinking mind. I was ignorant of the truth: that the life I was living was limited by everything I had been taught, learned on my own, and already experienced, the mental conditioning that is my past. I was ignorant in thinking that I could control my future sobriety, based solely on what I already knew from living my life in addiction. I was going to control the future by trying not to repeat my past, which is all I know; that kind of thinking is the definition of addiction, and my thinking is the root cause of all my additional substance addictions.
So, let’s cut to the chase. The truth is, I can’t think my way out of addiction; I can’t use my past to control my future, because that is the definition of addiction. I can’t use my “addiction to thinking” to stop thinking about stopping my “addiction to substances,” which is caused by my “addiction to thinking.” Writing that is hard enough, but saying that sounds like insanity, and insanity is the inability to stop thinking. Which means, to different degrees, we are all flirting with insanity, because all of us are addicted to our thinking. That’s all our conditioned mind knows how to do: repeat what we already know. The only authentic creativity I experience is when my mind is quiet, when the self-ego disappears, and all that remains is unrestricted Love flowing through me that creates the world around me, which is the activity of selfless creation—Love.
So, if I can’t think my way out of addiction, what am I supposed to do to end my addiction? It’s simple: STOP THINKING! That’s right: STOP THINKING. I need to stop thinking and start being aware of my feelings! Start observing, start witnessing, start silently focusing my attention—that’s right, shut up: stop talking and start listening to my heart. I want to put my arms around my heart, open it with compassion, and begin understanding the root cause of my thoughts and associated emotions that are arising right now. With loving kindness, I have to embrace my heartfelt emotions caused by the illusion that my thoughts are creating in my mind and body, as my mind tries to become and control something real in the world. That’s right, my mind is constantly craving to be something, anything real; it goes crazy and causes nothing but suffering, for me and the world that I project into, as it incessantly struggles to possess real power, ignorant that it will forever be powerless. My emotional, thinking mind can only be restrictive, blocking the flow of my creative energy, and that resistance causes my suffering.
Now, as I said, I am not promoting the need to follow any religion to stay sober. Still, I offer this correlation to understand better that the Truth of suffering has been documented for over 2,500 years, providing further evidence that we are not alone, and addictions have plagued humanity since the evolution of self-consciousness, our self-ego. So, this is part of my journey to open my heart, so I could understand my suffering in addiction and find my Higher Power to stay sober. I want to emphasize that the Four Noble Truths of Buddhism directly state that life is suffering, and there is a cause of suffering, which is the second Noble Truth: that the mind is constantly craving to be something real, rather than being a powerless restriction. The third Noble Truth states that there is an end to suffering; when we awaken to discover that our true Self is not our thinking mind, we are liberated. Finally, the fourth Noble Truth describes an Eightfold Path to help me stay aware of the Truth and live with less suffering, by living a righteous Life created out of Love.
In summary, if I can quiet my mind or I stop thinking when I hit bottom in my addiction, enough to open the door of my mental prison and see the light of awareness to understand the Truth of my suffering, then I can never unsee the light or forget the Truth. That is the transformational awakening of my eternal, true Self, with a capital “S”, Self-consciousness, which brings freedom from my limited, temporary mind-body—the lower-case self-ego—which lives in fear of death and blocks the energy of Love flowing through me. Through the stillness of effortless witnessing, I have uncovered the true nature of my silent, sober mind, which is freedom from thought and psychological time, my “Higher Power” of true Self-consciousness, free from the fear of death in the ever-present moment.
Staying sober is staying aware of my thinking, staying sober is staying aware of repeating the past, staying aware of my cravings, staying aware of the triggers that lead to using. Staying aware is meditation: calming my mind through awareness dissolves my cravings and disarms my triggers. When I stop thinking, my mind is still, and awareness happens, which is meditation—my Higher Power of awareness, is knowing I am; my true Self is the eternal, creativity of Consciousness experiencing itself through the activity of Love. I no longer live in fear of death; I am not addicted to thinking, and am no longer stuck in time, repeating the past, trying to control the future. Now that I’ve woken up, I live differently—in the present moment. By staying aware, I can remain sober, knowing that I am—my true Self—is enough; to feel complete, to be full-enough to project willingness, acceptance, compassion, Love, joy, and peace into the world; living in harmony with life’s creation in the ever-present moment. The time to wake up is always now!
VAB 04-07-25
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